I depend on others to feel happy. And too often my expectations are just too damn high to be actually met, maybe that's why I can't let myself feel complete happiness. Just don't let myself feel happy.
Weirdly enough, if everything does go well, I have to ruin it. Cause it's better to hurt myself than let others hurt me.
Thought I felt better these last ten or whatever days. Tonight I'm wondering when it's gonna end.
When happiness is dependent on other people.. it doesn't last too long.
But I like this feeling. A hint of maybe actual happiness. And I'm scared of losing it.
So scared of losing you.